I applied to be part of a project called Art in Hand for the Portland area. They have already done Charlotte and are in the process of doing Toronto I think. Anyways I got an e-mail saying they would be selecting people and due to the overwhelming response they were able to contact everyone personally. This in my world means hit delete and forget about it. I have little self confidence with putting myself “out there” because I doubt I am good enough. I am sure everyone is like this sometimes. I got an e-mail yesterday saying that I was selected as one of the 54 artists. So I will have a card in the playing card deck and submit the piece for the card as original art. It is auctioned off and the proceeds go to a non profit of my choice. I am really excited about this and then realized I have no idea which card to pick as my first or second or third choice. I like hearts but maybe not because that seems too popular. I am of course overthinking the whole thing. To me the number is more significant than the suit.

The past couple years I have been painting and drawing and journaling and taking photos. There always seems to be the easy way out of just stopping and giving up. I would like to be able to sell a few things. I have done this but not consistently and there are times when I wonder why I spend time doing this. Even though this acceptance is not a money making venture exactly it still seems like a sign from the divine or the universe telling me to keep going. For me I have validation sometimes when people I don’t know buy something and I realize they aren’t friends going “undercover” to do so and make me feel good. 🙂

On the card theme I had a painting included I believe in a tarot or hearts card imagery on flickr. It was sort of odd because I don’t think tarot at all influences my symbols. When I was doing a reading for myself the other night I saw the page of pentacles I think it is and it had a woman with a bird on her hand. That inspired me to do a quick drawing variation of the image which I will share later tonight.


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